1. I’m trying to see things from your point of view, but I can’t stick my head that far up my butt.
2. The fastest way to a fisherman’s heart is through his fly.
3. Stupidity is not a crime, so you’re free to go.
4. Beer: making women look better since 1965.
5. Before giving someone a piece of your mind, be sure you have enough to spare!
6. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every unsuccessful man there are two.
7. Condoms are easier to change than diapers!
8. Confucius say “Man who stands on toilet is high on pot.”
9. Confidence is the feeling you have before you understand the situation.
10. Dewey, Skrewem, & Howe (attorneys at law)
11. Diplomacy is the art of letting someone else get your way.
12. Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
13. Energizer bunny arrested; charged with battery.
14. Flies spread disease. Keep yours closed!
15. God gave man a brain and a penis but only enough blood to operate one at a time.
16. First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, and then the suffering…
17. Follow your dreams, except the one where you’re at school in your underwear.
18. Help stamp out and eradicate superfluous redundancy
19. House guarded by shotgun 3 days a week. Guess which days?
20. I took a pain pill. Why are you still here?
21. If everything is coming your way, then you’re in the wrong lane.
22. If you can read this, I can deploy your air bag!
23. If you’re against logging, try wiping your butt with plastic.
24. Relish today…Ketchup tomorrow
25. The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
I’ve never been a real fan of people that wear tattoos. For the most part, it seems like an attempt to garner attention. In particular, those with a large portion of their bodies tattooed seem to scream, “Look at me!” Others seem to do it as a novelty or to be cool and hip. There is also the full range of tattoos from tasteful to totally tasteless.
Last night, I was watching a TV show on The Learning Channel (TLC) called Miami Ink. It’s a show about a tattoo parlor in Miami, Florida. The show follows the daily experiences of its tattoo artists and the customers that come in to get tattooed. I have to admit, some of the tattoos that are created are truly artistic. The quality and realism of some of them really leap off the skin. From a purely artistic point of view, some of the workers are exceptionally gifted. Their craft really shows.
What has made me change my mind concerning tattoos is listening to some of the reasons that people are giving for their decision. For some, it’s a way of memorializing a friend or loved one. For others, it’s to commemorate a significant or memorable event in their lives. Last night’s show featured a young lady who was getting a tattoo of a piece of Kryptonite with the name Ivan stenciled below it. Ivan is her brother who is severely handicapped and is probably not going to live much longer. He is a big fan of Superman and she wanted to get the tattoo to always have a little something to remember her brother by. If I had seen that tattoo on her without knowing the story behind it, I probably would have thought it was stupid. There was another person, a pastor, who got a picture of a Phoenix on his chest and arm. He had been close to dying due to a medical misdiagnosis, but has since recovered. The Phoenix was a symbol to him that he was getting another chance at life, rising from the ashes, if you will. Again, had I not known the story behind it, I would have probably thought it a foolish display.
So there you have it. Sometimes what you initially perceive about an individual may be misguided. People have many different ways of dealing with events in their lives. For some, a tattoo is a sincere expression of their love or respect for someone or something. Try and factor that in the next time you meet someone. I sure will try.
The above photograph of Mount Shuksan was taken at the Mt. Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest in the state of Washington. If the rest of the national forest is anything like this picture, it would make a fine destination for any nature-lover. I’ve had very little exposure to the state of Washington. I once flew into Whidbey NAS in Oak Harbor and spent a few days there in the late eighties. I remember it being a friendly and quaint little town that reminded me of the small towns in southern Maine that I once lived in.
What I really like about this picture is the contrast between the mountain peak and the foreground. The vibrant and varied colors around the lake and the deep green of the treeline stand in sharp contrast to the monolithic shading of the mountain.
The name of the photographer who took this photo is Don Paulson. He hails from the state of Washington and is an accomplished professional photographer with numerous works in books, magazines and websites.
To see a gallery of his many and varied photographs, click here.
To view a higher resolution image of this photo, click here.
The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.
The local paper read:
PASTOR’S ASS OUT FRONT
The bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
The next day, the local paper headline read:
BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR’S ASS
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN
The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey. She sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read:
NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.
The next day the headlines read:
NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE
The bishop was buried the next day.
The moral of the story is . . .
Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery. Even shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else’s ass and you’ll be a lot happier and live longer!
Have a nice day.
Yep. You heard it here first. I know everyone and their grandmother are predicting that oil prices will continue to rise into the stratosphere reaching 6-8 dollars per gallon in the not too distant future. There’s peak oil theory, increased use in other up-and-coming industrial nations, etc. I, however, think oil price increases are not sustainable. Look at what’s happening right now. At four dollars per gallon, people are finally starting to get the picture. It’s actually beginning to affect more than just their discretionary spending. Until now, most people just ended up saving a little less of their income each year to continue their energy-wasting lifestyle. Now, it’s hitting them to where they are actually thinking about many of their trips to the store or whether or not that trip to the beach is worth it. You can see it in the number of trucks and SUVs for sale in everyone’s front yard.
Obviously, the price of oil has increased costs of almost everything that we use. Most consumer products are made from oil; if not directly, then certainly in the plastic packaging that it comes in. Transporting the products from the manufacturer to the retail outlets is also going up. If the price of oil were to continue unabated, there would be a worldwide recession. No nation could continue its oil-based economy at those higher price levels. With a collapsing economy, sales of goods would plummet, unemployment would skyrocket and oil prices and its use would decrease accordingly.
It’s just not in the best long-term interests of either the oil producers or consumers to see the price of oil go up unchecked. The price is reaching the point where a real hard look is being made at alternative energy sources. Oil extraction from shale and tar sands is becoming feasible. Nuclear power and offshore drilling have proven themselves as a safe means of providing energy. Increasing their use at this point in time may not affect the price of oil in the short term. However, it will have an impact on our energy independence and long-term future. Politicians need to get off their collective butts and start thinking long-term.
I’m not saying that the price of oil will collapse to 2-3 dollars per gallon, although it’s not an impossibility either. I do think that we’ve reached a peak and prices will either stay level for some time to come or will slowly decrease below the four dollar mark.
Well, folks. There you have it. My prediction on oil prices. No credentials or advanced degree (or undergraduate degree, for that matter) in Economics to back this up. Just my take on the world. Of course, if there’s a major war with Iran, or some other catastrophic event in the Middle East, all bets are off. Stay tuned.
Casket of Medal of Honor recipient, PO2 Michael Monsoor, U.S. Navy SEAL
Well, it’s the day after the 4th of July. Many people spent the day yesterday getting together with family or friends and enjoying the start of a three-day weekend. A lot of people also went to a local venue in the evening to enjoy a fireworks display. Depending on where you were or what you did, you might not have given a whole lot of thought to the reason behind the holiday celebration. I don’t think I need to get into any elaborate discussion of our country’s fight for independence and the sacrifices that many made to give us the freedom and liberty we have and, in most cases, take for granted.
I would, however, like you to take less than five minutes of your time to view a video by clicking on the link below. It’s a tribute to a Navy SEAL who paid the ultimate price, his life, so his fellow teammates could live. He did it for us, too, as many have done before him so we can continue to enjoy the many benefits and privileges of being a U.S. citizen.
To view the video, click here.
Thank you, Petty Officer Michael Monsoor. You are a hero in the truest sense of the word. We salute you and offer you our heartfelt thanks for your selfless devotion to duty, honor and country. You make me proud to be an American.
(For those that don’t know, the shiny items on the top of the casket are the gold Tridents worn by all Navy SEALS on their uniforms. While the casket was being brought to the burial site, each Navy SEAL took their Trident and embedded it into the casket.)
Since General Clark doesn’t seem to know when to shut his mouth, I’ll post another article myself. Liberal-leaning media outlets fall all over themselves when it comes to printing disparaging remarks about a Republican candidate. And when it comes from a military general, they’re salivating profusely from the mouth. However, what you almost never hear are some of the “inconvenient truths” about Clark himself. Let’s discuss them, shall we?
General Clark served as the U.S. Supreme Allied Commander in Europe during Clinton’s presidency and our short-term war in the Balkans. What many people don’t remember or realize is that Clark was relieved of his duty early as NATO commander. Shortly after the end of the conflict, the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff said, “The reason he came out of Europe early had to do with integrity and character issues.” If that isn’t a sharp slap in the face to a military man, I don’t know what is. Clark has always been a self-serving, photo-grabbing individual. While serving as NATO Commander, even his Secretary of Defense told him to get his face off the TV. Now, he’s constantly seen on the media circuit, trying to keep himself in the limelight.
Finally, let’s discuss the premise of his argument concerning McCain’s qualification to be president. Clark said, “I don’t think riding in a fighter plane and getting shot down is a qualification to be president.” That’s true enough. However, how he handled himself subsequent to that event speaks volumes. I can’t begin to imagine the sustained torture he endured for over five years in captivity. What many people don’t know is that the North Vietnamese offered to release him years earlier when they found out that he was the son of a Navy Admiral. He refused the offer. Those years of torture exacted a punishing toll on his body. From all the times that they broke his bones, he is unable to lift his arms above his shoulders.
I certainly don’t agree with McCain on many political issues. He is not my first choice for president. However, Clark’s characterizations are just plain wrong. No, Senator McCain doesn’t qualify for the presidency for being shot down in North Vietnam. How he has carried himself since then does.
